Regardless of the reason, divorce can be a highly stressful process. However, divorce mediation offers a cost-efficient and amicable way to navigate the situation. This is just one of the reasons why more people are turning to divorce mediation.

Perhaps you’ve heard of mediation but aren’t sure what it entails. Through mediation, you can both communicate your needs more effectively and work at a comfortable pace that allows for a smooth transition toward your separate futures. Mediation can save you money, resolve any concerns, and help you finalize your divorce more quickly than the traditional divorce process.

What Is Mediation?

Mediation is a viable alternative for couples who are looking for a fair and efficient divorce process. Through mediation, both parties collaborate to reach an outcome that works for everyone. A mediator is a third-party professional who helps guide the process so that spouses remain focused on their goal of a fair outcome.

Some topics covered in the process include the division of assets, child custody arrangements, and spousal or child support. Mediation is a less contentious process than divorce litigation. In mediation, spouses work together to create solutions that are mutually beneficial, fostering a more cooperative and less adversarial environment. This decreases the stress and trauma of divorce and contributes to a positive co-parenting relationship once it is finalized, which makes life easier for the children. In contrast, traditional divorce often involves lawyers representing spouses, leading to a confrontational, drawn-out, and expensive process.

The Problem of Post-Divorce Uncertainty

Divorce isn’t just a legal separation; it’s a deeply personal upheaval that affects every aspect of your life. Divorce proceedings can be costly and time-consuming, often leaving both parties financially strained and emotionally exhausted. Disagreements over child custody and visitation rights can turn into bitter disputes, causing stress and instability for everyone involved, especially the children. Feelings of guilt, anger, sadness, and anxiety are common, making it difficult to move forward and rebuild your life. After years of being part of a couple, many find themselves struggling with their new identity as a single person. The end of a marriage can leave one feeling that life is unfair, especially when one party feels wronged or misunderstood. The dissolution of vows and dreams that were meant to last a lifetime can lead to a deep sense of betrayal and loss.

But it doesn’t have to be this way. There is a different path that leads to healing and growth.

What Happens After Mediation?

I’m Steven Unruh, a divorce mediator with over 30 years of experience. I have witnessed firsthand the transformative power of mediation. My goal is to help you navigate this difficult time with dignity, respect, and a focus on creating a positive future.

During mediation, the mediator will provide clear next steps and a detailed summary of your divorce settlement agreement to be formalized and filed. The following steps of the process depend on the outcome of the mediation. If you and your spouse reached an agreement on every concern regarding the outcome, then the next steps proceed as follows:

  • You will receive a Memorandum of Understanding, which outlines your joint solutions for your divorce settlement.
  • You can choose to file yourselves or select a professional to formalize and file your agreement for you (we provide referrals).
  • If a paralegal or attorney formalizes and files your agreement, you generally don’t have to go to court.
  • If you file for yourselves:
    • Once you confirm you’re in agreement, you can proceed with an uncontested divorce. Divorce lawyers are optional for an uncontested divorce.
    • Prepare the paperwork for filing a joint petition, which you will both sign.
    • You can file your paperwork at the courthouse or online (if your state allows). If you are filing an uncontested joint divorce in New York, e-filing may be an option.
    • Receive and attend your court date to finalize your divorce. Both parties will sign the decree and submit it to the judge.
    • If the judge is satisfied that the outcome is fair, you will receive your divorce decree after filing it with the court.
    • After filing, you will submit another document called a Notice of Entry of Order, which must be served to the other party. You may serve it yourself, hire a process server, or pay your local sheriff’s office to serve these papers.

An uncontested divorce is a simpler and less expensive process than a contested one. It typically involves less time in court and fewer legal fees.

If you and your spouse cannot agree on all matters during mediation, each of you will receive copies of your mediator’s notes. At this point, you and your spouse can choose to work with separate lawyers to develop solutions for the remainder of your issues.

Moving Forward After Mediation

If you and your spouse successfully worked together towards an amicable divorce, the process after mediation is relatively straightforward. If custody agreements are implemented, you may proceed with this process and follow the agreed-upon schedule.

While amicable resolutions lead to less stress and trauma, be sure to reach out for support as you adjust to this new chapter. Friends and family can give you the support you need to move forward. Connect with others who understand your situation, and use this time for self-reflection and personal development.

This period can be an opportunity to set new goals and create aspirations for your future that you may not have previously considered. Practice self-care and embrace this opportunity to explore new hobbies, interests, and experiences.

Take Action Today

You might be wondering if mediation is right for you. Common objections include concerns about power imbalances, fear of not being heard, or skepticism about the process. As an experienced mediator, I ensure that both parties have a voice and that the process is fair and balanced. My role is to facilitate communication and guide you towards an agreement that works for everyone.

Divorce doesn’t have to define your future. Through mediation, you can find a path to peace and a new beginning. Imagine a future where conflicts are resolved amicably, where your financial and emotional health are preserved, and where you can move forward with confidence and hope.

If you’re ready to take the first step towards a better future, contact me today. Let’s work together to turn the page and start a new chapter in your life.