You’ve played the game long enough—walking on eggshells, second-guessing yourself, apologizing for things you didn’t do, and wondering if you’re the crazy one. From the outside, your life may look normal. But behind closed doors, you’re exhausted, anxious, and emotionally worn down. You’ve whispered to yourself late at night, “I need to leave… but how?” That question—that gap between where you are and where you want to be—is exactly why you’re here. And you’re not alone.

The Problem Isn’t Just the Relationship—It’s the Fallout of Leaving

When you try to leave, the narcissist escalates—spinning lies, making threats, guilt-tripping you, and using the kids or money as weapons. It’s not about resolving conflict—it’s about keeping control. They want to dominate the story and keep you entangled emotionally, financially, and mentally.

Even when you know leaving is the right choice, it rarely feels that way. You’re carrying years of self-doubt, fear, and quiet shame. You wonder if you have the strength. You second-guess your decisions. You worry what others will think. And deep down, you’re terrified of what happens next.

But it’s not supposed to be this way. No one should live under emotional manipulation or feel trapped in their own marriage. You deserve safety, clarity, and a future that finally feels like yours.

Here’s the truth: There is a way out—and you don’t have to face it alone.

A Smarter, Calmer Way Out

I’m Steven Unruh. I’m a divorce mediator with more than 30 years of experience, and I’ve helped many people just like you leave toxic relationships—without setting fire to everything on the way out.

I know the fear. I know the resistance. I also know what works. Divorce mediation gives you a way to step out of the chaos and into a process that brings clarity, structure, and dignity—especially when you’re dealing with someone who thrives on drama.

Let me walk you through some simple but powerful steps to begin your exit.

1. Stop Seeking Their Permission

You will never get their approval to leave—so stop waiting for it. Narcissists thrive on power, and your indecision feeds their control. The moment you stop asking, explaining, or defending your choices is the moment you take your power back.

• You don’t need to convince them.

• You don’t need to stay calm while they rage.

• You don’t need to explain your “why” one more time.

You do need to decide that you’re worth protecting.

2. Make an Emotional Exit Plan First

Most people make a legal or logistical plan to leave. But when you’re leaving a narcissist, your emotional plan matters just as much.

• Who will you talk to when they try to pull you back in?

• What boundaries will you set (and stick to)?

• How will you remind yourself of the truth when the gaslighting starts?

Prepare your heart for the emotional games—because that’s where the real battle will be fought.

3. Use Divorce Mediation to Stay in Control

Traditional divorce with a narcissist often turns into a war—one that drains your bank account and your emotional stability. That’s why mediation matters.

With mediation, you get:

• A neutral third party who keeps the process focused and fair.

• A faster, more affordable path to resolution.

• A calm, private setting that avoids unnecessary courtroom drama.

I’ve seen mediation work for countless people who thought it would be impossible. It gives you the structure and support to move forward without giving your ex more opportunities to cause harm.

4. Set Boundaries and Stick to Them

Narcissists don’t respect boundaries. That’s why yours need to be crystal clear and non-negotiable. Decide now:

• What conversations you will and won’t engage in.

• What you will allow around your kids.

• How communication will happen (preferably in writing).

You don’t have to explain your boundaries—you just have to enforce them. Every time you hold a boundary, you strengthen your future.

5. Focus on the Life You’re Building, Not the One You’re Leaving

Leaving a narcissist isn’t just an ending. It’s a beginning. Your future is waiting to be shaped by you—not distorted by someone else’s control.

Start dreaming again:

• Where do you want to live?

• What kind of peace do you want for your kids?

• Who do you want to become without the constant weight of criticism?

The more you focus on what’s ahead, the less power the past has over you.

What If They Don’t Cooperate?

They probably won’t—at least not at first. That’s why having a process in place, like mediation, makes all the difference. You don’t have to match their energy or play their game. Instead:

• You stay calm.

• You stay focused.

• You stay protected by the process.

And that’s exactly what I help people do every single day.

It’s Time to Take the First Step Toward Freedom

You don’t have to stay stuck. You don’t have to stay scared. And you definitely don’t have to go through this alone.

As a divorce mediator with over three decades of experience, I’m here to help you find a path out of the chaos and into a future that belongs to you again.

Ready to take the first step?
Let’s talk. I’ll help you explore your options and see if mediation is right for your situation.

Your peace, your freedom, your future—it starts here.